Black Boy Smile by D. Watkins

Author:D. Watkins
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
Published: 2022-05-17T00:00:00+00:00

Troy and Tweety looked at me as I told my story, then paused, and then both burst into gut-busting laughter. Their laughter exploded in multiple directions—every tooth in Troy’s mouth exposed, Tweety’s face turning from yellow to a shade of red, as I sat there, vulnerable, looking like a square. “This is why I don’t tell y’all clowns anything!” I said, downing my vodka, refilling the cup, downing that too.

“Hol’ up, hol’ up,” Troy laughed, falling to his knees, pounding the floor like a drum. “You were twelve and you didn’t know how to buy pussy from a MCI call center hooker? It’s easy, it only cost $40,” he hollered.

“No, that’s a lady,” Tweety hissed, “if she would’ve touched him, it would’ve been rape.”

“Men can’t get raped, Tweety!” Troy breathed. “Shut ya dumb ass up!”

“Both of y’all need to shut up!” I yelled.

They had a nerve to talk, I thought. The amount of drama between them made me nauseous. I could have any girl I wanted. Their love thing was all crying, heartache, and pain. Shardé didn’t do anything negative to me—as a matter of fact, she protected me by telling me to stay away from that apartment—but she had the power to suck me up into that kind of trance where I’d be blinded and dumb like them, and that wasn’t happening. I’d do anything to avoid somebody having that kind of power over me.

“You’ll never be happy!” Tweety belted out.

“What I do is safe!”

“I’ll drink to that!” Troy echoed.

“Money is safe, distance is safe!” I shouted. The both of them, as drunk as me, barking franticly like rabid dogs, so loud it was disturbing—but not really, because this was how we acted.

“Safe? We sell narcotics!” Tweety clapped back.

“You know what I mean?” Troy nodded in agreement.

“The past is the past, Watkins!” Tweety argued. “Living in the past shits on your future, don’t you ever forget that.”

I was taught to chase money. Dad drilled in me, “Always, always get ya money! Fuck everything else!” The girls said the men who couldn’t pay for dinner were jokes, to be laughed at—unworthy of coming around. (“Why is this nigga even talkin’, he broke!”) This was the rule, spoken or unspoken. It didn’t matter if a dude was smart, funny, handsome, had potential, or all of the above—because those things cannot feed people. If you are a man, you better have money. Shardé only spent time around men with money. She had no boyfriend or love interest.

“Aye Shardé, you ever go on dates? Like to big-money restaurants where a guy in a black vest plays the violin while you eat?”

“What? Hell no. You gonna take me?”

And I would’ve taken her in a minute—and I would’ve encouraged her to eat and drink all she wanted, and then we could’ve hit a movie, or the club, or both, and all of that cost money.

Tweety was a homie and Troy’s love, but their union was far from cheap. Their relationship was the strongest when we

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.